Jenna's Thoughts

I would like to formally address the ongoing turkey nonsense.  Frankly, I have had enough.  For weeks now, it has been nothing but turkeys, turkeys, turkeys.

Someone swallowed a ball bearing.
Someone is wearing a brand new sweater because of an “ouchie.”
Someone else is refusing to come off her nest at bedtime, requiring a full nightly search party like she is royalty lost in the wilderness.
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I would like to remind everyone that I am the actual royalty here.

Do you see me swallowing hardware? No.

Do you see me requiring outer garments?  Also no, though I would look stunning in emerald green.

Do I hide dramatically at bedtime so everyone has to come searching for me with flashlights and concern?  Absolutely not. I am exactly where I should be: near the food.

And now, because apparently they cannot manage basic social skills, they require an entire new barn. A whole barn.  Because they “can’t all get along.”

Imagine if I behaved this way.  “Excuse me, I require a second custom cow wing because Maisie looked at me funny.”

Honestly… now that I say it out loud, that does sound reasonable.  Perhaps I, too, need a private luxury suite. A peaceful place for reflection. A soft brushing station. Climate control. A dedicated carrot delivery entrance.

​This seems less like favoritism and more like fairness.

Though when I raised my concerns I did not receive the supportive response I was hoping for.  Meanwhile, the turkeys continue their chaos.

There is always a crisis.
There is always a vet bill.
There is always someone yelling.

I would like to submit my official request that we return to the natural order of things:
admiring me, bringing me snacks, and significantly less turkey nonsense.

Thank you for your attention to this urgent matter.

I will be accepting donations toward my private barn expansion immediately.

​- Jenna